Oh my goodness. I leave TOMORROW! I can't believe it...my journey is almost over!
As I've been thinking today I keep thinking about a new beginning, (which is actually one of the words I was given yesterday at Hillsong). And, I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am about my new beginning that I'm about to embark on. However, every new beginning innately requires an end to the old - you can't have a new beginning while you're still a part of the old. Which is sad, but freeing.
I'm so sad that I have to leave all of my family here in Australia but, it's worth it when I think of the rich memories I've made, the experiences I've had, and the amazing lessons I've learned. And all of that wouldn't have even been possible if I hadn't made such deep relationships while I've been here.
When I think about myself sitting on the airplane tomorrow all I can think about is what I felt as I sat on the airplane on the way over. I had BARELY convinced myself to actually step foot on the plane and into this new adventure, and I was completely and utterly scared out of my mind. I was unaware of what I was getting myself into, I didn't know a soul, I didn't even know an address!! The only information I had was a PO Box...and yet, I had this weird un-explainable peace and excitement.
I am so incredibly glad that God (with a little help from my mom and Kevin) convinced me to get on that plane that ended up taking me directly into life-change. And I'm even more excited and expectant about this new plane flight that will, as well, take me directly into life-change, again, but in an absolutely unexpected and new way!
If I tried to explain everything I've learned from this trip and everything I'm grateful for it would probably take at least a week! And, even as I try to write it all my mind is becoming overwhelmed with emotions that can't be put into words. The best way I can describe it is as a complete sense of expectancy, peace, contentment, and excitement! God has blown my mind over the past 3 months, and I know that he's going to continue to amaze me over the next 3 months, and the 3 months after that, and the 3 months after that... :)
The transition from old to new is awkward because I posses so many seemingly contradicting feelings - I'm excited to get home, but I'm sad to leave, however, I don't want to stay! I guess I can resolve all of these feelings with one feeling: ready-ness. My first blog ever was about how I was ready - that didn't mean I was prepared, it didn't mean I wasn't scared, it didn't even mean I was excited - it just meant that I was READY.
And, I am ready now. However this time my sense of readiness is accompanied with EXCITEMENT! I am so incredibly excited about stepping into my "old life" but with this new life IN me! It encourages me SO much that God's presence will be with me WHEREVER I go! Even as I write this, I'm making myself ecstatic, I can't wait to get home!!! Honestly, the more I think about everything that I'm going to do at home the more I can't wait to be on that plane!!! It's going to be AMAZING!
I invited God to come on the plane with me this afternoon (hopefully that will mean the seat next to me is open). And, as lame as it sounds it really does give me comfort. I'm not leaving God down-under. Wherever I go from this moment on, God will also be with me - how awesome!? The SAME God that has shown me comfort, excitement, life-change, prosperity, and SO much more in Australia, is the SAME one that is coming back to Dallas Texas with me, and he was with me even before I left!
One thing that has stuck with me VERY significantly this entire trip was what God told me as I flew over Syndey harbor on August 25th. As we started flying lower over the beautiful water with the sunset rising in the background God whispered gently to me, "This is where our love story begins"...and it has been the theme statement of my trip, and has become more true than I could ever have hoped for. But something that God has whispered to me since is , "This is not where our love story ends..." And a truer statement couldn't have been spoken. My love story has a beginning, but it will never have an end. I will be able to look back and say that I found God's heart in Sydney Australia but I didn't leave it there.
This time tomorrow I will be flying thousands of miles above the Pacific ocean as this journey truly comes to an end...but I'll soon flip the page and start reading the next chapter of this endless love story, just with a new backdrop.